INSTANT

                       COLLECTION OF QUOTES 28
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If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But
if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?   

Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?   
Because no one wants to quit.   

I have the most marvelous recipe for meat loaf! All I have to do is
mention it to my husband and he says, "Let's eat out!"   

Those who think they have not time for bodily exercise will sooner or
later have to find time for illness. -Edward Stanley

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not
smart enough to know they were impossible. -Doug Larson

The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and
we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it. -Michelangelo

The best liar is he who makes the smallest amount of lying go the
longest way. -Samuel Butler

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?   

I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.   

Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days
I've stayed alive.   

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50
for Miss America? 

There are no passengers on Spaceship Earth. We are all crew.
-Marshall McLuhan

Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere
nearby. -Ruth E. Renkel

Criminal: A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient
capital to form a corporation. -Howard Scott

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize
they were the big things. -Robert Brault

Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to
discover that, despite all the progress that has been made in the last
30 years, many foreign people still speak in foreign languages.
-Dave Barry

May you live all the days of your life. -Jonathan Swift

An enemy is one whose story we have not heard. -Gene Knudsen Hoffman

Let us reform our schools, and we shall find little need of reform in
our prisons. -John Ruskin

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
-Woody Allen

The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world
are the ones who do. -"Think Different", Apple Computers Advertisement

I wish there was a knob on the TV so you could turn up the
intelligence. They got one marked 'brightness' but it doesn't work.
-Gallagher

Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which
does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children.   
-Khalil Gibran

Work is the curse of the drinking classes. -Oscar Wilde 

ADVICE   
If your mind goes blank, don't forget to turn off the sound.   
-Red Green   

A careful study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy
anything is last year.

A government that is big enough to give you all you want is big enough
to take it all away. 

Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull
the trigger.

Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age
and start bragging about it. -Will Rogers

True, a little learning is a dangerous thing, but it still beats total
ignorance. 

Most people don't know how to listen because the major part of their
attention is taken up by thinking. -Eckhart Tolle

You cannot do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it
will be too late. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans, and the
homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of
totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty and democracy?   
-Mahatma Gandhi

If you know how to spend less than you get, you have the philosopher's
stone. -Benjamin Franklin

If the world seems cold to you, kindle fires to warm it. -Lucy Larcom

To see we must forget the name of the thing we are looking at.
-Claude Monet 

Art is not what you see, but what you make others see. -Edgar Degas 

A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has
a song. -Chinese Proverb

The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right 
sometimes. -Horace

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the 
middle of it. -P. J. O'Rourke

The art of flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
-Douglas Adams

It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time
raising us than you have. -Bart Simpson 

It is easier to believe a lie that one has heard a thousand times than
to believe a fact that no one has heard before.

No rules for success will work if you don't.

It is more rewarding to watch money change the world than watch it
accumulate. -Gloria Steinem

Never take the advice of someone who has not had your kind of trouble.
-Sidney J. Harris

To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in
doing it. -G. K. Chesterton

When you give someone a book, you donít give him just paper, ink, and
glue. You give him the possibility of a whole new life.
-Christopher Morley

Man has always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins
because he had achieved so much -- the wheel, New York, wars and so on
- while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water
having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins have always believed
that they were far more intelligent than man ... for precisely the
same reason. -Douglas Adams

The vision must be followed by the venture. It is not enough to stare
up the steps - we must step up the stairs. -Vance Havner

My son has taken up meditation - at least it's better than sitting
doing nothing. -Max Kauffmann

The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to
them; there ought to be as many for love. -Margaret Atwood

The reason there are so few female politicians is that it is too much
trouble to put makeup on two faces. -Maureen Murphy

Modern technology
Owes ecology
An apology.
-Alan M. Eddison

One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do
the work of one extraordinary man. -Elbert Hubbard

For a successful technology, reality must take precedence over public
relations, for Nature cannot be fooled. -Richard P. Feynman

The production of too many useful things results in too many useless
people. -Karl Marx

The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge
faster than society gathers wisdom. -Isaac Asimov

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of
subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. -Hal Borland

Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment
by the corrupt few. -George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you
don't think.

Everybody always talks about the weather, but no one ever does
anything about it. -Mark Twain

Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your
dog would go in. -Mark Twain

The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but
that they know so many things that ain't so. -Mark Twain
                                                                              
Not all those who wander are lost. -J R R Tolkien

A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.
-Adlai Stevenson 

The tighter you squeeze, the less you have. 

Man stands in his own shadow and wonders why it's dark. -Zen Proverb

It should be noted that the games of children are not games, and must
be considered as their most serious actions. -Michel de Montaigne

When photography was invented it was thought to be an equivalent to
truth, it was truth with a capital "T". -Vicki Goldberg

It takes a lot of imagination to be a good photographer. You need less
imagination to be a painter, because you can invent things. But in
photography everything is so ordinary; it takes a lot of looking
before you learn to see the ordinary. -David Bailey

The virtue of the camera is not the power it has to transform the
photographer into an artist, but the impulse it gives him to keep on
looking. -Brooks Anderson

We live in a society exquisitely dependent on science and technology,
in which hardly anyone knows anything about science and technology.
-Carl Sagan

The important thing in science is not so much to obtain new facts as
to discover new ways of thinking about them. -Sir William Bragg

A theory is something nobody believes, except the person who made it.
An experiment is something everybody believes, except the person who
made it. -Albert Einstein

There is one thing even more vital to science than intelligent
methods; and that is, the sincere desire to find out the truth,
whatever it may be. -Charles Sanders Pierce

Science fiction is no more written for scientists that ghost stories
are written for ghosts. -Brian Aldiss

The scientist is not a person who gives the right answers, he is one
who asks the right questions. -Claude Levi-Strauss

It is inexcusable for scientists to torture animals; let them make
their experiments on journalists and politicians. -Henrik Ibsen

Look at these cows and remember that the greatest scientists in the
world have never discovered how to make grass into milk.
-Michael Pupin

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car, but
if he has a university education he may steal the whole railroad.
-Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Education is when you read the fine print. Experience is what you get
if you don't. -Pete Seeger

Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of
dollars to a man's lifetime income - which he then spends sending his
son to college. -Bill Vaughan

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Compiled 2005 by Jiri Matejicek, Instant Wisdom.
Feel free to copy anything you like. If you decide to redistribute the
whole file, please leave this note within -including the URL.

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