COLLECTION OF QUOTES 21

Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority
of the people. -Giordano Bruno

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an
understanding of ourselves. -Carl Jung

If God wanted us to be naked, why did he invent sexy lingerie?
-Shannen Doherty

A man is only as good as what he loves. -Saul Bellow

Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.

You cannot tell which way the train went by looking at the track.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which
ones to keep. -Scott Adams

There are no rules for good photographs, there are only good
photographs. -Ansel Adams 

A good scapegoat is nearly as welcome as a solution to the problem.

A coupla months in the laboratory can save a coupla hours in the
library. -Westheimer's Discovery 

The trouble with doing something right the first time, is nobody
appreciates how difficult it was. 

The wonder of a single snowflake outweighs the wisdom of a million

You cannot plough a field by turning it over in your mind.

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's
office was full of portraits by Picasso. -Rita Rudner

One of the greatest labour saving inventions of today is tomorrow.
-Vincent T. Foss 

Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their

Think getting older sucks?  Consider the alternative.

Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.

Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.

Life is 10 percent what you make it and 90 percent how you take it. 
-Ben Franklin

Some goals are so worthy, it's glorious even to fail.

I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you
must eat it with naked fat people. -Ed Bluestone

Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it. 

Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being
governed by those who are dumber. -Plato 

A liberal is a person whose interests aren't at stake, at the moment.
-Willis Player

Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.
-William Butler Yeats 

Butterflies are not insects, they are selfpropelled flowers. -Heinlein 

To the victim, a "practical joke" is usually neither practical nor a

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first
time for three days and the second time for four days. 

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

A shortcut is the longest distance between two points.

A man who works with his hands is a laborer; a man who works with his
hands and his brain is a craftsman; but a man who works with his hands
and his brain and his heart is an artist. -Louis Nizer

Often the hands will solve a mystery that the intellect has struggled
with in vain. -Carl G. Jung

I tried to get a life once, but they told me they were out of stock. 

I went to school to become a wit, only got halfway through. 

A personís right to smoke ends where the next personís nose begins.

A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper
tray and the blinking red light.

Creative minds always have been known to survive any kind of bad 
training. -Anna Freud

A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes
longer. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am an agnostic; I do not pretend to know what many ignorant men are
sure of. -Clarence Darrow 

Treasure the love you receive above all. It will survive long after
your gold and good health have vanished. -Og Mandino

The noblest of all dogs is the hot dog; it feeds the hand that bites
it. -Laurence Peters

You cannot get to the top by sitting on your bottom. 

Do not believe that it is very much of an advance to do the
unnecessary three times as fast. -Peter Drucker 

When an old man dies, a library burns down. -African proverb. 

Freedom is that instant between when someone tells you to do something
and when you decide how to respond. -Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein

People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of
thought which they seldom use. -Kierkegaard

Freedom is always and exclusively freedom for the one who thinks
differently. -Rosa Luxemburg 

Freedom to learn is the first necessity of guaranteeing that man
himself shall be self-reliant enough to be free. -Franklin D. Roosevelt

There is nothing wrong with people possessing riches. The wrong comes 
when riches possess people.

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that 
four of his fingers are pointing at himself.

A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

Do witches run spell checkers?

If a man tells a woman she's beautiful she'll overlook most of his
other lies.

Man stands in his own shadow and wonders why it is dark. 
-Ancient Zen saying

Donít focus on being different, focus on being yourself - and your
difference will naturally shine through! -Kevin Eikenberry

If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.

Keep me from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does
not laugh, and the greatness which does not bow before children.
-Khalil Gibran

Men, like nails, lose their usefulness when they lose direction and
begin to bend. -Walter Savage Landor

The highest reward for a man's toil is not what he gets for it but
what he becomes by it. -John Ruskin

Live simply so that others may simply live... -Gandhi

One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do 
the work of one extraordinary man. -Elbert Hubbard

Beware of small expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship.
-Ben Franklin

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have 
exhausted all other alternatives.
-Abba Eban

In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle,
stand like a rock. -Thomas Jefferson 

No matter what you eat it comes out looking like shit. 

The world is coming to an end. Please return your library books. 

Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be

There are no short cuts to any place worth going. 

The average woman prefers beauty over brains because the average man
can see better than he can think. 

Don't forget to smile, your smiles make the world a better place. 

Many a man thinks he is buying pleasure, when he is really selling
himself to it. -Ben Franklin 

What progress we are making. In the Middle Ages they would have burned
me. Now they are content with burning my books. -Sigmund Freud 

The only thing we learn from history is that we do not learn from

The British have a reputation for keeping calm even when there is no

Always try to be the best, but don't ever think you are the best. 

Everything can be filed under 'miscellaneous.'

Machines that have broken down will work perfectly when the repairman

When a girl says "No" she really means "Yes", but not with you.

Friends are chocolate chips in the cookie of life.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

If you believe everything you read, better not read. -Japanese proverb

A collective tyrant, spread over the length and breadth of the land,
is no more acceptable than a single tyrant ensconced on his throne.
-Georges Clemenceau

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

A pencil without an eraser may as well just be a pen.

Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
-Abraham Lincoln

Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live.

Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than
the people who have to wait for them?

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.


Compiled 2002 by Jiri Matejicek, Instant Wisdom.
Feel free to copy anything you like. If you decide to redistribute the
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