COLLECTION OF QUOTES 15 ---------------------------------------------------------------------- You are forgiven for your happiness and your successes only if you generously consent to share them. -Albert Camus There is nothing wrong with people possessing riches. The wrong comes when riches possess people. Please leave a tone after the message. Taxpayer: Someone who doesn't have to take a public service exam to work for the government. I went on a diet but I had to go on two diets at the same time because one wasn't giving me enough food. -Barry Marter Why is there always so much month left at the end of the money? Time is money, money is the root of all evil, and knowledge is power. Therefore, procrastination is the key to world peace. Reference Manual: Object that raises the monitor to eye level. Also used to compensate for that short table leg. There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats. I prefer to be a dreamer among the humblest, with visions to be realized, than lord among those without dreams and desires. -Khalil Gibran Ever notice how it's a penny for your thoughts, yet you put in your two-cents? Someone is making a penny on the deal. -Steven Wright The greatest and noblest pleasure which we have in this world is to discover new truths, and the next is to shake off old prejudices. -Frederick II, the Great Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor. -Queen Elizabeth I of England Christmas: Be Naughty - save Santa the trip. What's on the mind when sober, is on the tongue when not. -Josh Seidel If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy. Love has reasons that reason knows nothing of. Beware of the half truth. You may have gotten hold of the wrong half. The pursuit of truth shall set you free - even if you never catch up with it. -Clarence Darrow Nature never deceives us; it is we who deceive ourselves. -Jean-Jacques Rousseau Contradiction is not a sign of falsity, nor the lack of contradiction a sign of truth. -Blaise Pascal Truth fears no questions. Art is the lie that makes us realize the truth. -Pablo Picasso Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth. -Ashleigh Brilliant A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author. -Gilbert K. Chesterton So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of all money? -Ayn Rand A true friend stabs you in the front. -Oscar Wilde I am a deeply superficial person. -Andy Warhol Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on. -Winston Churchill If a person offends you and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures. Simply watch your chance and hit him with a brick. -Mark Twain Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off and get to bed! -Thomas Edison's Mother Truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it. -Flannery O'Connor When our eyes see our hands doing the work of our hearts, the circle of Creation is completed inside us, the doors of our souls fly open and love steps forth to heal everything in sight. -Michael Bridge So long as governments set the example of killing their enemies, private individuals will occasionally kill theirs. -Elbert Hubbard Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. Your attitude and your aptitude will determine your altitude. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others. The act of giving is more important than the merit of the receiver. It is the greatest of all mistakes to do nothing because you can only do a little. The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. When the doctor says... "We have some good news and some bad news." ...the good news is he's going to buy that new BMW, and the bad news is you're going to pay for it. Every morning you are handed 24 golden hours. They are one of the few things in this world that you get free of charge. If you had all the money in the world, you couldn't buy an extra hour. What will you do with this priceless treasure? Remember, you must use it, as it is given only once. Once wasted you cannot get it back. To his dog, every man is Napoleon. Hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley Mind Like A Steel Trap - Rusty And Illegal In 37 States. You're driving a car. It isn't a telephone booth, a beauty parlor or a restaurant. A much wittier reply came to mind immediately after I clicked the 'Send' button. The willow knows what the storm does not: that the power to endure harm outlives the power to inflict it. There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. -James Holt McGavran To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe. -Marilyn vos Savant The road to success is always under construction. The man who views the world at 50 the same way he did at 30 has wasted 20 years of his life. Who does not thank for little will not thank for much. -Estonian proverb Many seek good nights and lose good days. -Dutch Proverb Don't be so humble, you're not that great. -Golda Meir If you treat every situation like a life or death matter, be prepared to die a lot of times. Perhaps the greatest social service that can be rendered by anybody to the country and to mankind is to bring up a family. -George Bernard Shaw They say that time changes everything, but it's been a while now and my kid's diapers aren't getting any cleaner. -Jeff Chastain Eighty percent of success is showing up. -Woody Allen The fate of a nation has often depended on the good or bad digestion of a prime minister. -Voltaire There's lots of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it. - Josh Billings The poorest man would not part with health for money, but the richest would gladly part with all his money for health. -C.C. Colton Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young. -Sir Arthur Wing Pinero If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it. -Andy Rooney Smile at people. It takes seventy-two muscles to frown, only fourteen to smile. My best friend is one who brings out the best in me. -Henry Ford If cows could fly, would we still get ground beef? All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK. -Robert Fulghum Gratitude is the heart's money. -French proverb For age and want save while you may, no morning sun lasts a whole day. -American proverb Advice to a fool goes in one ear and out the other. -Danish proverb Action without thought is like shooting without aim. -American proverb Advising is easier than helping. -German proverb Do not ask advice of the ignorant. -Indian (Tamil) proverb Do not say to your neighbor, Come back later; Iíll give it tomorrow -- when you now have it with you. -Proverbs 3:28 Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at the present. -English proverb He that goes barefoot must not plant thorns. -English Proverb The difficult is done at once, the impossible takes a little longer. -Slogan of the US Armed Forces He asks advice in vain who will not follow it. -French proverb Ask for advice but do what you think is best. -Greek proverb Have a vision not clouded by fear. -Cherokee proverb The history of free men is never really written by chance but by choice--their choice. -Dwight D. Eisenhower The liberty of using harmless pleasure will not be disputed; but it is still to be examined what pleasures are harmless. -Samuel Johnson Each person's life is a story that is telling itself in the living. -William Bridges The significant problems we face cannot be resolved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them. -Albert Einstein To go against the dominant thinking of your friends, of most of the people you see every day, is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can have. -Terence Hanbury White He who stops being better stops being good. -Oliver Cromwell A good programmer is someone who looks both ways before crossing a one-way street. -Doug Linder George Washington's brother was the uncle of our country. Budget: A method for going broke methodically. Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves. -Abraham Lincoln We are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past, but by the love we're not extending in the present. -Marianne Williamson Here's a test to find whether your mission in life is finished. If you're alive, it isn't! -Richard Bach He lives long that lives well, and time misspent is not lived but lost. -Thomas Fuller Love is the only drug you can take that will convince you each time that you've never had it before. Some people wish to get what they deserve, while others fear the same. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms. Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river. -Nikita Khrushchev If you learn tricks, you'll be a caterpillar that flies, not a butterfly. -Baba Ram Dass Beware of too much good staying in your hand. Pay it away quickly in some sort. -Ralph Waldo Emerson A committee is a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours. No matter how you wiggle and dance, the last three drops will go down your pants. Laugh, it is the music of the soul. One warm smile is the international language of kindness. Life is like a flowing river. When obstacles get in the way, like a river your only chance to make it is to rise above it and flow on. You don't want to sit there like a puddle unless you want to get stepped on. No one is so eager to gain new experience as he who doesn't know how to make use of the old ones. -Marie Ebner von Eschenbach Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us. -Voltaire Skillful pilots gain their reputation from storms and tempests. He who is outside the door has already a good part of his journey behind him. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Compiled 2000 by Jiri Matejicek, Instant Wisdom. Feel free to copy anything you like. If you decide to redistribute the whole file, please leave this note within - including the URL.