06/19/01

INFAMOUS QUOTES OF STATE TROOPERS

"So, you don't know how fast you were going.  I guess that
means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

"The handcuffs are tight because they're new.  They'll
stretch out after you wear them a while."

"Warning!  You want a warning?  O.K., I'm warning you
not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

"Just how big were those 'two beers'?"

"The answer to this last question will determine whether
you are drunk or not.  Was Mickey Mouse a cat or dog?"

"Yeah, we have a quota.  Two more tickets and my wife
gets a toaster oven."

"No sir, we don't have quotas anymore.  We used to have
quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets
as we want."