05/30/00

Do you have any idea who I am?

An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being
smart and funny, and making her point,  when confronted with a passenger
who probably deserved to fly as cargo.

A crowded United flight was cancelled. A single agent was rebooking a long
line of inconvenienced travellers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his
way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said:
-"I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." The agent
replied:
-"I'm sorry sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help
these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out."
The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers
behind him could hear:
-"Do you have any idea who I am?" Without hesitating, the gate agent
smiled and grabbed her public address microphone:
-"May I have your attention please?" she began, her voice bellowing
throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at the gate WHO DOES
NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come
to the gate."

With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at
the United agent, gritted his teeth and swore:
-"F*** you!" Without flinching, she smiled and said:
-"I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to stand in line for that, too."