05/28/99

***INTERNET JUNKIE WARNING SIGNS***

You know it's time to turn your computer off and read a book when .......
1. A friend calls and says "How are you? Your phones have been busy -- for 
a year!!!!!"
2. You forgot how to work the TV remote control.
3. You see something funny and scream, "LOL, LOL."
4. You meet the mailman at the curb and swear he said YOU'VE GOT MAIL.
5. You sign off and your screen says you were on for 3 days and 45 minutes.
6. You fall asleep, but instead of dreams you get IMs.
7. You buy a laptop and a cell phone so you can have AOL in your car.
8. Tech support calls YOU for help.
9. You beg your friends to get an account so you can "hang out."
10. You get a second phone line just to call out for pizza.
11. You purchase a vanity car license plate with your screen name on 
it.
12. You say "he he he he" or "heh heh heh" instead 
of laughing.
13. You say "SCROLL UP" when someone asks what it was you said.
14. You sneak away to your computer when everyone goes to sleep.
15. You talk on the phone with the same person you are sending an instant 
message to.
16. You look at an annoying person off line and wish that you had your 
ignore button handy.
17. You start to experience "withdrawal" after not being online for a while.
18. "Where did the time go??"
19. You sit on AOL for 6 hours for that certain 
special person to sign on.
20. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.